alex catchall

[diluvian]

the best satan to ever exist

Comments

[camena]

Hey, I'm only good at scolding. I wouldn't trust me in a fight.

[diluvian]

Oh, don't worry. That's mostly what bodyguards do. Tell people to stand back and not bother their charges. You can do that much, can't you?

[camena]

I do think people would be more intimidated by you than me. But sure. I volunteered.

[diluvian]

Congratulations. You're my bodyguard now.

[camena]

Do I get paid?

[diluvian]

It depends on your price, but I'll be professional and fair.

[camena]

One dollar for every time I stop someone from bothering you.

[diluvian]

[ Hmm.... ]

Fair enough. We'll see if anyone tries to earn you money.

[camena]

I'll put it towards a discount if we need to do an injury check.

[diluvian]

Oh? That's smart of you. You get a passing mark.

[ she really does sound impressed here. ]

[camena]

I didn't realize I was being graded.

[diluvian]

Every week, we are with how much money we receive.

[camena]

By you, I mean.

[diluvian]

I'm always evaluating.

[camena]

Sounds tiring.

[diluvian]

Would it make it less tiring if I said I'm always processing, too?

[camena]

The opposite.

[diluvian]

[ she laughs a little. ]

So much seems to tire you out.

[camena]

[ I HATE YOU ]

No, I'm full of energy because I'm not doing all that tiring stuff.

[diluvian]

[ I LOVE YOU COLA ]

I can't help how I am any more than you can help how you are.

[camena]

[ IF YOU LOVED ME YOU'D BE ALIVE 😭 ]

Then let's just both stick to being how we are. It's fine, it like... balances out.

[diluvian]

[ DFJLSAFJ I DIDN'T CHOOSE TO DIE simply join me in the graveyard

she sounds almost amused. ]

Are you saying we balance each other out?

[camena]

[ i crave death, and yet, ]

Sure, why not?

[diluvian]

[ when was the last time you were a victim, cola

hmm... ]

That lacks conviction.

[camena]

[ not counting 2week games... 7rings. ]

Want me to scream it from the rooftops for you?